It might be hard to realize it and possibly accept it since we focus so much on our flaws. How can we love ourselves for being so wrong in so many ways? And more, who can love us?
I know, I’ve been there. And in many ways, I still get hit by self doubt and sometimes can’t see pass my own flaws which gets magnified by my own comparisons to others. But you know what, we all have flaws. That’s just it. However, we can choose to focus on our skills and talents–the good things we like about ourselves. No matter how small they are. We can still choose to see through these positive attributes of us. And the great thing is little miracles starts to grow in us.
And if we choose to dwell in our flaws, I don’t know how much we can go from there. Let me tell ya, it is an endless abyss. And the more we focus on our flaws, the more it seems to get bigger…and we seem to be less and less in control. The next thing we know, we are locked in our own mind–imprisoned by our own imagination and intolerable trait(s).
How can we shift our focus? And let alone–stop feeling like we are less than. First thing is watch our mind. Be aware of our thoughts. Catch that part that goes automatically to compare. We only need to compare ourselves to our ideal self that we are working towards. (This is so we can see we are moving in the direction of our goal.) Because there’s always going to be someone who we think is better than us.
What I mean is we only need to compare how far we have come to our ideal self compare to where we used to be. This not only gives you a sense of accomplishment but adds more positive good things about you. This is the best use of comparison…it uplifts us to see ourselves in better light.
And yes, we still own our flaws. If there’s something you can do about it. Then do it! But don’t obsess over things we just can’t change. It’s like playing a broken recorder of “You suck! I hate you.” that tells you over and over how horrible a person of you are.
Do we really want to hear that? Perhaps, our mind originally was trying to protect us by some twisted ways. But if it is not serving your greater good anymore, isn’t it wise that it’s time to let this fixed idea go. Let go of this damaging belief.
I’m not saying block it out, denied it. I’m just saying–accept it. Accept that we all have flaws. And then love that we are unique…and focus on what good attribute we are blessed with. And go use these talent and skills.
It’s like that story. Four men are given different talents from the Almighty.
The first guy used all his 5 talents that God gave him.
The second guy immediately put his 3 talents to work.
The third guy was happy and used his 2 talent to create great companies.
And the fourth guy looked at his talent and was disappointed. God asked him why he hadn’t used it. The guy sadly explained, “You only blessed me with one talent and the others guy were blessed with so many. Did you not love me as much? How can I ever be as good as them? They got all the talent and I only have one.”
Comparison really does us a number of things. It keeps us from even taking action sometimes because some of us are too busy thinking about why we ONLY got one good thing and more flaws than anyone we see. It’s extremely disempowering to be defeated by our flaws. And worse, we never took the necessary action to turn that one talent into something real.
I honestly believe we create ourselves. We use those talents we are blessed with and make the best of it. Sean Stephenson, put it very well. He said, “You don’t find yourself, you CREATE yourself. Who do I want to be?”
Read article: How to ReWRITE Your Future
