What’s inner game versus outer game? Authentic Man Program’s (AMP) co-founder, Bryan Bayer breaks down the difference by using the image of the Celtic tree. The Celtic tree is an ancient symbol of wholeness that illustrates the relationship between “who we are” (inner game) and “how we show up” (outer game).
AMP says, “These days, a lot of guys are studying the art pickup. And, if those pickup/outer game skills aren’t connected to a solid foundation of inner game, those men will never create relationship as wild, sexy and fulfilling as they can truly be.”
AMP adds, “Even if your outer game is masterful it is a only a matter of time before any woman will see who you are at the roots. You can’t hide it and you can’t fake it. And the more radiant the woman is the faster she will see right down to the base of it often instantly.”
Such an amazing explanation!
Recently I went to a concert to see Boyce Avenue, Jabbawockeez, and Kris Allen at MusicFest 2010 in Cebu, Philippines. Boyce Avenue’s lead singer, Alejandro Manzano really carried himself self well. He showed up incredibly sexy. I said to myself, “This guy’s got inner game going on! Wow!”
When Kris Allen performed…he didn’t have it. As talented as Kris is, he felt hollow to me. He needs to do more inner work and build his foundation. Won American Idol but he’s not showing up as a grounded solid guy. Not attractive compared to Boyce Avenue’s Alejandro who’s roots just over shadowed Kris. It was such a contrast I even left after Kris sang his first couple songs!
When we start chasing things outside ourself, it’s easy to ignore our roots. Then it becomes even more challenging to attract the people we want to attract. Remember: We’re drawn towards the healthy trees – strong and grounded. We ignore the weak ones with flimsy roots.
Single? Listen up. This might help. These little neat ideas is not mine, I’m sharing it because I think it will put the clue back in the clueless mind for those who haven’t come to this realization yet.
You could use it or discard it. What ever you choose, you are the master of your own universe. If you see it’ll help you out on attracting a better girlfriend, by all mean try it out.
These 2 simple tips alone will create miracles in your love life.
A few things I’ve learned from Authentic Man Program (AMP) is the power of presence work wonders. It helps you stay aware and present in whatever you do. It takes practice to hone this skill. Just like learning to ride a bike, it’ll take many attempts before you become comfortable and skilled at it. Presence essentially helps you stay in your body and enjoy the moment as it happen. I guess you can say, keep your mind quiet and still. Whether it is for dating or for your daily life, staying present and grounded is an attractive attribute to women –actually to everyone.
Have you ever talked to someone and their attention is everywhere. Distracted and can’t even focus on the conversation or the experience at the moment. Their eyes wander and their mind seems far off somewhere.
A man who can master his own mind; bring awareness and presence into his being is considered a rare commodity for women. Definitely, becoming more aware and present is of a great value. We (women) know and can pick a solid guy out from a mile away. It’s extremely attractive and undeniably sexy!
Second thing that bring wonders to your life is to stay appreciative. What is appreciation? Here’s what Authentic Man Program has to say about it, “Most guys think Appreciation is saying nice things. This couldn’t be farther from the truth. In fact, ‘Creating Profound Connections‘ has absolutely nothing to do with even being nice. It’s all about building a strong, deep level of rapport… an emotional connection that you cannot fake. ”
Everyone wants to be appreciated and acknowledged. You can start to practice appreciation by being thankful for the small things in your life. Stay in gratitude for what you have and not what you don’t have.
Man, do they work like magic. People can feel when you are being genuinely appreciative of them. Their faces will light up and smiles will start to appear. It’s contagious.
When you stay in the state of appreciation, most women will reciprocate your state of emotion and shoot back those same great feeling. It’s a great feeling at both ends. And 99% of the time you’ll get back a warm smile.
Have you ever got a genuine sincere acknowledgment from a person. They say it in such a way that you know it is from their heart. They really meant it and not just one of those generic, “Thank you. Come again.” from the cashier’s mouth. You can somehow always tell the difference.
Practice these two new habits and master them. You will not only attract a better mate but bring more fun into your life. You’ll turn many frowns around. Stay grounded in who you are. And bring quality experiences into your life far more than just the original intended goal of acquiring a girlfriend.
The only downfall is these 2 simple new habits take time to be integrated into your life. Even for me, I am still working on ‘staying present and being appreciative.’ It’s really a daily practice. You actually have to do it and gain the experience –for you to truly understand and incorporate it into your life.
Learn it, KNOW it, walk it, and you’ll be surprise how much more amazing your life can get.
Today, I just want to applaud the work Authentic Man Program (AMP) does. Growing us new crops of genuine men. Isn’t that just fabulous, I mean I hear other women often complain. “I just can’t find a good man anywhere. They are either married or gay.” How many times have you heard that?
Which is why, I am so proud to introduce to you what Travis Decker and Bryan Bayer are doing for the men community. They committed themselves to helping men who are interested in developing themselves and building their authenticity of who they really are. What can be more intriguing and worthy of our (women) attention than that?
The bad news is we women probably aren’t allow into their workshops unless we are part of the women discussion panel of AMP. However, we can peek at their CDs and see what the men are actually doing. Sshhhh!
Decker and Bryan had started a movement in San Francisco to build strong men. Men who honestly desire the deep meaningful connection with us women and within themselves. Nothing is sexier than that! These are NOT men who are taught to use gimmicks to fool us into falling for them but real honest men with integrity and desire to be strong in who they are. Who truly wants to love themselves and share their presence and appreciation with us.
I’m honored to write this post to acknowledge their efforts and urged all women out there that want to support their men to support AMP men by perhaps forwarding this blog post to any men in your life that may be searching for the very same thing Authentic Man Program are offering. That is to be in love and strong in who they are as a man because they are truly being the best of themselves.
Below is the link to a short video clip from Bryan giving us a preview -inside of what AMP is. And how 90% of the challenges with us women (for men) is traced down to this 1 thing…
Listen to The New Man (Tripp Lanier: men’s coach and host of The New Man podcast) talk with Bryan Bayer and Garrison Cohen of the Authentic Man Program. This interview is great; unlike others, this interview is just like talking to some of your guy friends. But for women — WARNING: The conversation has some strong word use. It’s a very male conversation since it’s tailor to men.
Tripp Lanier is a great host despite his swearing. His enthusiasm is contagious. There’s lots of valuable information. It’s not just for men. It’s an inside scoop for women to better understand our men too.
This audio talks about men being honest with themselves and what they want. It covers: how men sell themselves short by tolerating stuff and then feeling like shit. How they are left feeling empty, and out of integrity because they’ve agreed to something that they really didn’t want to. How men are withholding their true feelings and denying their emotions or upsets. And how this actually impedes their progress and suffocates their own self. But most importantly, it tells the men what to do to tear down these obstacles and bring back their integrity and power!
Relationship out of integrity? Best place to start is to work on you. To be open to your feelings and honest of your own truth. The more you can do this…the more your presence, appreciation, and integrity radiates in your life. You’re not just being the ‘nice guy’ or ‘nice gal’ so others will approve and accept you. Calling it out in yourself. Embodying your truth. Let yourself out.
The Authentic Man Program helps men break through that barrier and unleash the authentic man within.
I want to share with you this unedited yahoo chat of my friend Eric and I. I’ve already asked him for his permission to show it with you on this blog. Although, I’ve changed the name to Eric for his privacy.
Just a little heads up, I am currently living in the Philippines and he is still back in California.
Below is our unedited chat:
Eric: Hey Faey. It’s Eric.
Me: Hey Eric. Just online browsing for course on ‘how to be authentic’. What you up to?
Eric: I am doing laundry right now. ha ha
So, have you found out how to be authentic? ha ha
Me: yep!
Do my laundry for me pls. =)
Eric: ha ha. You’re funny, Faey
Send your laundry to me through email
Me: Watch for it Now
zip…!
Eric: Wow! That’s a lot of laundry! he he he he
Me: I know…haven’t wash them for 10 months..be careful of some clothes, they’ve been dirty for quite a while.
Might have some dead snakes, I’ve killed.
Eric: LOL – okay. I’ll be careful.
But here I can just kill spiders with your dirty clothes
Me: just don’t let me know about it.
Eric: Okay I will. We have some Black widows around here. So I’ll definitely let you know.
LOL
Any plans for this weekend?
Me: do some more research on authentic women program…then watch the Authentic Man Program Mark is watching to learn about MEN…so far finish 3 cds and it is super delicious!
Eric: cool. Sounds very interesting. I’d imagine a person would gain a lot of enlightenment from it
Me: none of that tricks and fake stuff and liners to give to women …it teaches men how to access their true, REAL self…..I am so impress..
yelp…lots of insights and enlightenment…..
Eric: I see. I think a lot of people would gain from it
Me: I think of it….these programs are growing new refreshing crops of men for all the women out there….he he he…then I’ll stop hearing all the good men are taken or they’re all gay stuff. =) he he he… I mean who wouldn’t want a REAL man who knows himself, be present, and be his genuine self. Of course that would mean the woman be her true self to match with these type of REAL men too…..can’t have them nagging immature little girls. It just wouldn’t match…He he he….sorry..I am just going on and on…
Eric: It’s cool Faey. You’re always welcome to express yourself with me
I look forward to your insight
I agree with you and this program
Me: thanks for allowing me that space. so appreciated. =)
Eric: Anytime, my friend
Me: got two new insights if you are curious
Eric: Sure…I’m always open
Are you still there?
Me: sorry about that…was watching a video of Authentic Man Program
anyhow, briefly…the first 2 steps…of accessing your authentic self for Men are: STEP 1: Presence. BE there. Not trying or thinking about being there. But actually being in the moment, enjoying it with ease. Just be at ease. Check in your body and see if you are tight in your body or rambling on in your head or fidgeting. (these are signs of you not being ‘present’). Just RELAX and be in your body. Feel instead of thinking. Just be there.
You could use this with women. Actually, you could use this with anybody, anything….especially with yourself.
Creates solidity in YOU as a person.
Eric: I like this. And I feel that I do these things right now. Because recently, I have found that I am very content with who I am as a man, as a person. I enjoy my own time & time with friends, and I don’t yearn for outrageous things.
Please continue. I’m enjoying this
Me: Good. Well done on your steps forward! =) STEP 2. Appreciation. This means with your interaction with women and others. You see them as another person, not just an object or target to get. But treat and see them. They too have dreams, issues, feelings, and needs.
It means stepping into their shoes feeling what they are feeling without your agenda…or for example “hummm, I see you are so warm and nurturing and etc.”
It does not mean complimenting her and making her feel good.
It’s about being there with her on the ride. Yet, you being solid in who you ARE at the same time. You CAN’T…just do step 2 or skip ahead to step 2 unless STEP 1: Presence is deep rooted and grounded in you.
Eric: Yes, you’re absolutely right. Basically, seeing each person for who they are. I think that’s why I’ve gained so many female friends. This is deep.
I’m not saying I know it all. I’m actually just analyzing everything you tell me and then I think if I’m doing that or have I applied it.
what’s step 3?
Me: want to add a little more on Step 2 still.
Eric: Oh. Ooops. Sure go ahead
Me: So like I said, it’s not about complimenting her and solely making her feel good. It’s about being THERE with her. Feeling what it IS what she is feeling. Allowing her that space. Yet you be there fully present and enjoying your interaction and being authenticly CURIOUS. (no pretense). You truly feel curious to know about her and who she is. If you do it right.
You could feel her heart open up to you. And she might stop being all bitchy and become real sweet or tone down…she’ll feel…wow this person really SEES me.
This will create intimate connection with them.
for love or for friendships..many types of intimacy
Interests will build between the two individuals….
Boom! relationship is created…
Takes practice…..
Eric: After reading this, I really feel that many Americans could benefit from this knowledge
And I agree on so many accounts with the steps you’ve provided to me
Me: glad you like it.
Oh and remember, just one more thing. The whole time you are being YOU — stay REAL to who you are.
Eric: Right.
I’ve gotten into Zen philosophy, It’s really helped me
It is similar with its outlooks on life, respect and responsibility
Me: Nice. Love zen….
Eric: I want to be a modern day Jazz Monk
Me: hey Eric…I going to have to cut it short….starting some more training soon. BTW, can I use this yahoo IM conversation for me blog?
Eric: Sure. Go ahead
Me: he he he…’modern day JAZZ Monk’ i could see that.
Eric: Have a good day/night
Me: Alright, ttyl. In the meantime time chill out…or should I say keep it jazzy… =)
[Date: 08-23-2009 Yahoo IM]
Thank you for visiting me today. And love to hear what you have to say.
I discovered the Authentic Man Program (AMP) because I was searching for something to help me get in touch with my genuine feminine self. And all I ran into were stuff about how to get the opposite sex turned on and attracted to me. I want to build more attraction for myself! Do you get me? Perhaps, I was looking at the wrong places and haven’t found that hidden goldmine of women’s knowledge. It was exhausting searching through the web. That’s when I was like, hummm –maybe I can learn a thing or two from the men’s AMP training.
I love being surprised, in a good way of course. The Authentic Men Program was a delightful surprise! I could really relate to the guys teaching it. They are just regular dudes, not the drop dead gorgeous GQ models or the dashingly handsome actors, but they have such an intoxicating vibe about them! Can’t quite describe it at first. But after watching their trainings: Presence DVD and Appreciation DVD, I was beginning to understand why they had such a magnifying attractiveness. It was their ability to maintain their full awareness and presently be there with themselves and us women. It was mesmerizing to watch.
Then their DVD on appreciation really had me speechless. It focused on staying appreciative regardless of the circumstances. Appreciating that there is another person you are talking to. You’re not talking at them but really SEEING the other person as another living breathing individual with their own set of values, thoughts, opinions, needs, and feelings. It’s like that saying, “Being in another person’s shoes”. This was really something that I thought was the most valuable and everyone ought to understand.
AMP training really did an amazing job on helping others who want to LOVE…truly integrate this into their lives. It takes practice and work to let these new paradigms grounded in a person. It’s not a magic pill that gives you instant super power over women. And Authentic Man Program doesn’t just talk about it; it encourages their students to participate in the exercises and drill it. It’s experiential. Which is why I love it even more, you get to put it into practice right there and then and really feel how it is and integrated in your life. Yes, I am a woman. But even women can use the principles and apply it in our lives.
Travis Decker and Bryan Bayer not only teach these men to attract the opposite sex and appeal to them, but also how to sink into their genuine own self. Tap into that masculine energy source! Not only did I learn a lot about myself, I have fun the whole time. I think even if you are a woman, it’s worth the time to just check it out…if you are at all curious what healthy men’s dating world is like. Or even better; send your men to check it out.
